Rejoicing, Hoping, Praying

Romans 12:12 “Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.”

This verse kind of summarizes my weekend. God has been hitting home with some big lessons for me this week. I wanted to share about them.

Rejoice- For my personal devotions, I have been reading through Revelation. I read chapter 4 most recently and was reminded of God’s holiness and the fact that he is worthy to be praised. Revelation makes it pretty clear that God is worthy to be praised just for being God. But Revelation also lists other reasons why we should praise God. We should praise God because he is powerful [Revelation 4:5]. We should praise God because he is outside of time (was, and is, and is to come) [Revelation 4:8]. And we should praise God because he created all things [Revelation 4:11]. Above all else, in spite of anything else, we must remember that God is worthy of our praise and so we have reason to rejoice in him.

Hope- God taught me a lesson on hope this weekend too. I arrived at church on Sunday morning to hear that one of the members of our church that has used a walker for as long as we’ve been there, was hospitalized with a heart attack and loss of oxygen and is on life support. It is what seems like a hopeless situation. If he recovers, he goes back to life with a walker and other health issues. But if he doesn’t recover, he dies. To the world, that is a hopeless situation. But to the believer, there is hope on both ends because of Christ. No matter what, we know that God is his provider. We know that even if Bob never finds healing on earth, there is eternal healing waiting for him in Heaven. I can never understand how people can through life without Christ, because without him there is no hope. This verse reminds us to rejoice in that hope that we have which will help us to be patient in tribulation.

Prayer- Lastly, God taught me about prayer this week. Patrick and I went to see “The War Room” on Friday night and I thought it was one of the better Christian movies that have come out recently. It was an excellent reminder of the power of God that is accessible to us through prayer. I was convicted to spend more time praying over things and less time trying to fight battles on my own. This verse instructs us to be constant in prayer- definitely easier said than done. My prayer life isn’t so hot but this verse adds to the importance of heating it up. How much effort we put into fighting battles on our own when we have a God that wants to help us! That is all the more reminder to be constant in prayer.

Rejoice in God because he is worthy of praise. Hold fast in hope in Christ. And  spend time in constant prayer to the one who is worthy of all power, glory, and honor.

Confessions of a Pittsburgh Missionary: The Harvest

July 18-August 7, 2015

I know, I know, it’s about a month later and there’s three weeks of ministry that you never got to read about. So here I am, more than a month later, writing the last installment of updates from the summer ministry. Maybe once I explain what’s been happening in my life over the course of the past month or so, you’ll understand why I’m just now getting to this update.

I spent Saturday, July 18 volunteering at the local rescue mission in Pittsburgh. This is always an eye opening and humbling experience for me. It’s also good for me to get involved in ministries that require me to do the behind the scenes work or that is just serving people. I am all too often used to ministries where I am the one leading or doing the evangelizing. But it is good to spend some time just serving.

The next week, we had two clubs. Both of these clubs were going to be at Salvation Armies. A summer missionary from Westmoreland County, Dakota, was scheduled to help me that week. Unfortunately she was only able to help the first two days because she got sick after that. I was praising God for a committed and available board that gave up their time to help me the other three days of the week. We went to the first club, which was a day camp with the Salvation Army in Homewood-Brushton. The kids were a good group of kids and we had a lot of fun with them. This was a new club and a new opportunity to reach the kids. I had conversations with some of the older boys in the club about who Jesus was, how we knew he was real, and other deep questions. Once that club was over, we drove down the street into East Liberty to do a club at the Salvation Army Family Caring Center. This is a homeless shelter that we went to last year. It was once again, one of my favorite clubs for the summer. We had five little ones that were full of energy and love. One of the little girls at that club was named Yazlin. She was talking to me one day and when I was asking her about sin, she mentioned that she sinned and so did her mommy because her mommy stole from stores and had been kicked out of CVS and Target and the list went on. She also mentioned that her father was in prison and so they were living in the shelter. I was heartbroken for this little girl. I was especially heartbroken because she spoke about this so nonchalantly. This was her life. She knew that what her parents had done was wrong but it was a normal part of everyday life for her. Even at 7 years old, Yazlin had witnessed and faced a lot more struggle in life than I ever had. The good news is that Yazlin and two other boys accepted the Lord as their Savior that week. Now, even though there’s not much hope in the world they live in, they have hope in the Lord in Heaven.

The next week was one of the busiest weeks of the summer but also another good one. We partnered with Hosanna House Ministries in Wilkinsburg and helped out with their summer day camp. We took over an hour rotation of their regular schedule. This was 10 AM to 4 PM every day and it was 6 rotations of kids and took lots of our energy. But these kids were a ton of fun and we really enjoyed our time with them even though we were exhausted at the end of every day. I had two favorite memories from that club that stand out to me. The first is that after giving an invitation with one of the groups, nearly all of the boys in the group responded. Granted, a lot of those boys were just copying others. But I believe we still had nine of those boys give their lives to Christ that day. The second was that while I was counseling a group of girls, I asked one girl there if she had ever believed in Jesus as her Savior before. She explained that she had believed and given her life to Jesus while I was just talking. I was reminded once again that this work of evangelism is not done by my own strength, but through the voice of the Holy Spirit speaking to his children. There were about 160 children enrolled in the camp and at the end of the week, we saw 31 of those children give their lives to Christ. It was an awesome week of ministry.

At the end of that week we put on a Summer Scoop event that was supposed to be an end of summer celebration for all of the children that we reached. Unfortunately, only 2 children showed up. It was yet again, an excellent reminder to be flexible in ministry. We went on with the program with the kids and board members that had shown up. Even though it wasn’t what we were hoping for, it was still a good time of fellowship for all that were there.

That brought me to the last week of summer ministry, August 3-7. This week was much calmer than the prior week as we just had three house clubs. House clubs usually have a lot less children than community centers and since it was the last week, I was kind of looking forward to a break. Mary was back to help me with the clubs for the week since AJ was at horse camp. Our first club that week was at a house in the North Hills. This club was a ton of fun and another one of my favorite clubs that summer. The kids were definitely suburban, upper class, churched children and were completely different than most of the other children we had encountered that summer. But they were so much fun! They loved the club and were very enthusiastic. They were also a bunch of nerdy, Harry Potter loving, and goofy kids- I suspect that’s why I liked them so much. We didn’t see any salvations at that club but we did have a few days where we just allowed the kids to ask some really deep and important questions like, “If Jesus is the only way into Heaven, where did people go when they died before Jesus died on the cross?” Ministry isn’t just fruitful when you can count salvations. This was definitely a fruitful club even without salvations.

After that, we went to a café in the North Hills that my friend owns. This was a tough club as not many kids were in attendance. But we did gain a family of neighborhood girls that came several days. We made the most of the children that we had and still had a good club. I was encouraged a few days ago to see a Facebook post from my friend that owns the café with a picture of her daughter and one of the neighborhood girls. The girls said they were already saved but they didn’t go to a church. I am praying that my friend and her family will be able to continue ministering to this family.

And the last club of the week was at one of our board member’s homes in Wexford. This was another small club of girls that were already churched. We weren’t able to meet every day but we did have a good time with the kids that we had. One of the girls had been attending Good News Club for a while and one day, she was the only one. On that day, I handed her the pictures and let her tell me the story as best as she could. It was an excellent opportunity to disciple her and hopefully put a spark for missions and teaching in her heart. She was only 10-12 years old, but she was really mature and I know God has big things in store for her. Be praying for growth in Christ for Celeste.

If you haven’t already heard, that week ended in me getting engaged and so things have been pretty busy since then. But God is good and it was a good summer. It wasn’t always easy at times and I was definitely forced to be flexible and trust in God even it seemed like everything had gone to chaos. But God never stopped being in control. At the end of the summer we had reached about 500 children and saw 62 of those children make first time salvation decisions. It was a great summer and God did an awesome thing in Pittsburgh.

I am getting married, graduating, and moving on from Pittsburgh. It saddened my heart a bit in that last week to know how much of a harvest for ministry and evangelism there is in Pittsburgh. I can only pray that God will send someone into that harvest as I move onto another harvest. Pray with me that God would send willing laborers into the harvest so that even more can come to know the Lord as their Savior.

Our Love Story

How We Met  August 17, 2014

On August 17, 2014, my brother was joining me for school at Davis College. As the concerned older sister that I was, I was naturally intrigued by who Alex’s roommate was going to be. After some asking around, I discovered that Alex’s roommate was going to be my good friend Jackson’s cousin, who was also starting at Davis that year. I totally Facebook crept on Patrick to see what he would be like. But when he arrived and I met the very polite and personable southern boy, I was pretty much instantly interested in him. I started finding opportunities to spend time with him. It was convenient that my brother was his roommate, “Hey Alex, do you wanna hang out? Why don’t you ask Patrick to come too?” When he volunteered for CEF I casually managed to get his number. But when I tried texting him later, I never got a response and I figured he wasn’t interested enough.

On September 12, 2014, I found the perfect way to start talking to him. I happened to be in the library when I overheard Patrick and some of his friends talking about playing “Words with Friends.” Words with Friends has a chat feature and I just knew if I started a game with Patrick, that I could casually strike up conversation with him. So I downloaded the app right then and there and sent him a game request. We started talking through that app on Friday. Finally, Words with Friends led into texting and Patrick and I were conversing regularly throughout the day. When we did see each other in person we’d exchange shy glances and smiles and occasionally some playful or polite words.

Our First Date September 19, 2014

On September 19, 2014, Patrick and I had our first “date.” Since Patrick didn’t have a car on campus I had told him the night before that if he ever needed to go somewhere he could just let me know. The next day after classes were over, I “casually” mentioned to him that I couldn’t decide if I wanted to go grocery shopping or just take a nap. I was laying down getting ready to take a quick nap when he texted back and said, “Well if you decide to go grocery shopping, let me know, I’ll tag along.” I bounced out of bed and texted back saying, “Yeah meet me in 15 minutes outside.” So Patrick came with me to Aldi to go grocery shopping. Romantic first date right? After we finished and were walking back onto campus together, Patrick was saying, “Ah… Friday night… what to do?” I knew he was baiting me but I didn’t want to give in so easily. He then said, “I will probably end up just doing homework.” I quickly threw in a little bait of my own, “Homework on a Friday night? That’s lame!” But he didn’t take it. Neither of us took each other’s bait. Later on when I was hanging out with another friend, I instantly regretted not taking the bait. And so I sent him a casual text saying, “If you’re bored with homework, you could always come hang out at the café with us.” He did and then afterwards we went to Sweet Frog with some of my friends. The next night, after I’d finished watching an episode of Dr. Who and had sent him a text saying, “Well the episode is over, I don’t know what I’m doing now.” After a bit, he finally just out right asked me to hang out. We went to McDonald’s and got smoothies and then sat on the Davis benches (notorious for couples) and talked the rest of the night.

The Start September 25, 2014

From that night forward, we hung out every day. After a few days of hanging out, we expressed our feelings for each other but weren’t necessarily in a committed relationship yet. At this point, I was at a point where I truly felt that God had called me not to get into another relationship unless I was pretty sure it would end in marriage. I made that known to Patrick and he also expressed to me that he was also done with the dating game. Both of us, prior to meeting each other, held the quote, “A woman’s heart should be so lost in God that a man must seek him in order to find her” very close to us. Only Patrick shared with me that he had flipped that for himself. If he wanted to find a godly woman, he was going to have to seek God. Patrick and I earnestly prayed about starting a relationship for a few days.

On September 25, 2014, Patrick and I were sitting on the gazebo on campus chatting with each other. I asked Patrick what God had been saying as a result of his prayers and he asked me the same. That night we expressed to each other that we both felt that God was giving us the go ahead. We both felt like we were right for each other and we could both see the relationship resulting in marriage. That was the night that we “defined the relationship” as some would call it, and what we consider to be the true start of our relationship.

We laid low for a while however until Patrick was able to talk to my father about our relationship over our October break. My father, although a bit nervous at the thought of his daughter getting into a serious relationship, gave his blessing. Things haven’t always been easy for us, but God’s blessing over our relationship has always been obvious to both of us.

The “L Word” October ? 2014

I’m gonna warn you ahead of time. This is a disgustingly sappy love story. You were warned.

Patrick and I had been together for a little while at this point and the chemistry between us was obvious. I had never felt the way about anyone like I felt about him. Patrick and I had many conversations about love being a choice and not just a magical connection that some people had. We had also discussed how serious of a decision that was and how we had both said it too soon in other relationships. But at this point, I was pretty sure that I was ready to make the choice to love Patrick.

We were sitting in my car one night, chatting with each other, and looking lovingly into each other’s eyes. I wanted so badly to tell him that I loved him, but I of course didn’t want to be the first one to say it. As Patrick held me, he asked me what I was thinking. I hesitated and decided to say instead, “I feel loved.” Patrick responded by saying, “Well… you are,” he said, “And at the risk of saying it too soon… I do. I love you.” I was all smiles as I said, “I love you too.” Patrick explained, “I was hesitant to say it because I’ve said it too soon before, but this is different.” I nodded. I also knew that this was different than any other time I had ever told someone that I loved them. I returned to my dorm room all smiles and I’m pretty sure I smiled for the rest of the night.

The First Trip to Mt. Washington October 11, 2014

Patrick came home with me for fall break that semester to formally meet my parents. The view from the Duquesne Incline on Mt. Washington has always been one of my favorite tourist attractions in Pittsburgh. That’s partly because my father proposed to my mother on top of Mt. Washington at a slightly different spot. Since it was Patrick’s first trip to Pittsburgh, I decided to take him to the Duquesne Incline. We rode up the incline and then went out onto the overlook right next to it.

The night couldn’t have been more perfect. When we initially got up there, there were a few people around. We went to the edge of the outlook and looked at the beautiful lit up Pittsburgh skyline that decorated the evening sky. About the same time, a guitarist set up his guitar and began to play some soft music. It was the perfect atmosphere: the lit up skyline behind us, the guitar playing softly, and the fact that we were with each other. I remembered that I couldn’t stop smiling and even laughing. As Patrick and I lightly swayed to the music, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was the one for me. No other person had ever made me so happy.

Patrick and I made several other trips to that overlook since that first night. Any time we visited Pittsburgh, we would always make at least one trip there. It became one of our favorite spots to visit whenever we happened to be in Pittsburgh.

The Proposal August 7, 2015

On August 7, 2015, Patrick had come to visit me in Pittsburgh for a few days before we went on vacation to his home town for a week. That Friday night, he planned a date for us to go out to eat at one of our favorite restaurants in Pittsburgh, El Campesino, and then we were planning on riding the Duquesne Incline up Mt. Washington.

I had slight suspicions that Patrick might be proposing that night. I knew he had taken my grandma’s wedding set to get cleaned up so I could use them. But Patrick had told me he wouldn’t have them until after we returned from vacation. I had wondered if he was just telling me that so I wouldn’t know when he was proposing, but I figured if he did have them earlier than that, he would have proposed in Wilmington.

I had also, unknowingly, tried to ruin his proposal plans on a few different occasions. I found out that the CPR certification for school was earlier than I had planned. I had considered cancelling our trip to Wilmington, and his trip to Pittsburgh, altogether so that we wouldn’t have to pay for the certification. Patrick convinced me to let his father pay for the course and so his trip to Pittsburgh was still on. Even when he was there, I was really overwhelmed because I’d had no time to pack. I asked him the night before if he just wanted to forget our date night altogether so that I could pack instead. Patrick had very adamantly insisted that we still go out. So, despite all my unknowing attempts to ruin his plans, we went out for our date that night. “Why don’t you wear that new dress, Lindsey?” My mom said as I went upstairs to get dressed. That added to my suspicion a bit as well.

So Patrick and I went out to eat and then drove into the city towards the Duquesne Incline. We rode the incline up to our favorite spot. There was a Pirates game going on that night and a blimp was circling the city. The overlook was pretty crowded because of that. When I saw how crowded it was, all of my suspicions about Patrick proposing went away. I figured that even if he was planning on proposing that night, there would be no way he’d want to do it with so many people around.

We hung out, waiting for the crowd to disperse a bit so we could get to the edge where the view was. I noticed a photographer that my family knew, Kandy, and even whispered to Patrick, “See that lady taking pictures? She goes to the church that my mom works at. She took Alex’s senior pictures.” Patrick thought for sure that meant I knew he was going to propose and she was there to take pictures of us. But I didn't put the two together and I just thought she was there taking candids on a nice night. I was also too shy to approach Kandy and say hello. There was even a family that approached Kandy and asked her to take a picture. Kandy had to whisper, “See that couple over there? He’s about to propose so I can’t.” Apparently the mom wasn’t very discrete about it when she went back to her husband and explained why she couldn’t take their picture. Thankfully, I didn’t hear her say to her husband, “See that guy over there? He’s about to propose.”

Once the edge had cleared a bit, Patrick then went over to the viewfinder and put some money into it. He started looking around before saying, "Hey look at this, can you see that banner down there?" I looked into the viewfinder and looked down where he had aimed it. But all I could see was the fountain at the point of the three rivers in Pittsburgh. “The fountain you mean?” Patrick had to redirect it so I would be able to see it. I had to look into it again. That's when I saw two people down on the point holding a sign that said, "Lindsey, will you marry me?" It was my parents! I was practically frozen at the viewfinder. Everything felt so unreal! My heart started racing and everything started to blur.

Patrick got down on one knee next to me said, "That's your parents down there. Can you read the banner?" I don’t do well in high adrenaline situations so I kinda stopped thinking about what I was doing. I was still looking through the viewfinder but I nodded and said, "I know what it says." I think he had to pull me away from the viewfinder. He was holding the ring in front of me. At some point I did actually say yes. But I also took the ring box from him and held it in my hand. Patrick said, "I love you. I can't wait to spend my life with you." He stood up and we held each other, exchanging smiles as we did. As I said, I don’t do well in high adrenaline so it took me a while to remember I was supposed to actually put on the ring. I opened the box and Patrick took out the ring and slid it onto my finger.

I took a picture of the ring on my finger and sent it to my parents who were still down below in a text that said, “I said yes.” My parents drove up to the overlook and we all exchanged hugs and smiles. It was a beautiful night and I couldn’t have been happier. I had no idea Patrick was going to do so much planning. I’d also expected him to propose in Wilmington. But he had known that involving my parents and proposing around the same spot that my parents got engaged would be important to me. Patrick and I went home after a while and celebrated some more with my parents at home after calling my brother, who was in Laos at the time. My parents, before returning home, drove down to the spot on Mt. Washington where my father proposed to my mom. Needless to say, it was a wonderful night.

Patrick and I are so excited to start the next phase of our journey together on March 19, 2016.

Confessions of a Pittsburgh Missionary: It Won't Return Empty

July 4-18, 2015

I know I’m terribly behind on a blog update so I am going to update you on the past two weeks once again. I am finding it harder to keep up with all of the paperwork and office work that has to be done this year much more than last year. I’m not totally sure why but if you think of it, please pray for me! My office to do list can get a bit overwhelming at times. Hence why I’m making it a priority to blog (it was one of the more fun things on my to-do list).

July 5-10 started another week of ministry and once again we had two clubs. AJ had left me for Mahaffey yet again. So Mary Cooper, a Westmoreland County summer missionary, came and stayed with me so she could help out in Pittsburgh. I was very grateful for her help. We had two clubs. Our first club of the day was at Rankin Christian Center. Chloe and I had gone to this club last year and had a blast with the kids. Once again, Mary and I had a blast with the kids this year. They were certainly a lively bunch that kept both of us on our toes. But they were also passionate and enjoyed us as much as we enjoyed them.  Our evening club was my home church, Fellowship Alliance Church, Soccer Camp. This started on Sunday and went until Thursday. It was a delight to have Cathy and the rest of her crew join us to help out Sunday through Tuesday. It’s always fun when we get to work together. At soccer camp, the kids spend most of their time learning soccer skills and playing the sport, but during a 30 minute rotation, they sit and listen to a story from us. The CEF team does a lightening round club (cutting out most everything except a Bible lesson, memory verse, and a few songs). We get to see a lot of kids and it’s a lot of fun. On the last night of soccer camp, it rained and we had to huddle under roof. I was pleased that since we were confined to the small dry place, all of the parents that had stayed also heard the gospel as I presented it to the children. We didn’t hear about any decisions made by parents, but the word of God does not return void. Pray for any seeds that were planted in the hearts of parents. By the end of the week, we had 9 salvations at Rankin and 2 at Soccer camp. Praise God!

Harvey enjoys helping us set up for Soccer Camp.

July 13-17 was an interesting week. AJ was back and his younger brother, Caleb, also tagged along a couple days. We had three clubs. The first two clubs were at housing developments in McKeesport.

Our first club at Crawford Village went relatively well. There were both good days and bad days. Sometimes the kids could get a little rowdy but in mind, they behaved pretty well. I got nervous when we arrived on the first day and the director of the YMCA program that we partnered with came up to me and said, “We’ll do our best to help you… we’re rooting for you. We have twice as many kids as last year.” With that expectation in place, anything short of chaos was bliss. Later in the week he told me that for some reason they only had half as many kids as usual and they were giving us their best behavior. While part of me was disappointed to hear there were a lot of kids that we were missing, I believe it was also a blessing in disguise. A team of 2 or 3 simply couldn’t have handled a crowd as big as he said they usually had. While I would have loved to reach more kids, I’m not sure any of them would have heard the gospel if the room was chaotic the whole time. In moments like these it’s best to remember that God is sovereign. While I would have opted for more kids, God knew who needed to be there and knew what we could handle. We still reached 44 children at Crawford and saw 12 of them make first time salvation decisions.

The second club of the day was at Harrison Village. Harrison was one of the more challenging clubs I have ever done. Last year it was a difficult location because there was no structure and we couldn’t get any of the kids to participate in the club. We had to do open air activities like face painting and other games instead of a club. I was pleased to hear this year that they had reopened a YMCA lunch program and this year there would be some sort of structure for us. The kids at Harrison were great. I was excited to Sinai again, a little girl I’d run into last year that accepted and noticeably changed in her behavior for the Lord. The kids were enthusiastic and I could tell they enjoyed having us. The YMCA leaders, however, could not have cared less that we were there. We soon discovered that our new challenge at Harrison was no the children, but the leaders. The leaders gathered around a desk while we did the program with the children. They played cards and didn’t bother to talk quieter than usual. Occasionally they would even burst out laughing or yell across the room to someone. Most of the leaders were really nasty to the kids and yelled at them for even small things. It was really ironic when they’d scream at the kids any time they got even mildly jittery or noisy. Since we were in their domain, I didn’t feel comfortable asking them to be quiet. So AJ and I learned how to use our stage voices even in a small classroom. I made sure to thank the leaders before leaving on Friday. One of the leaders told me “thank you” and that she had really enjoyed. I don’t know if she meant that, enjoyed it because we took care of the kids for an hour, or was just being polite. But all of those leaders sat in the room while we shared the gospel with the kids, both at Harrison and at Crawford. I may never know what effect we had on the adults in both of those rooms. But I know that God’s word is powerful and does not return empty.

Kids playing games in the gym at Rankin Christian Center.

One little girl at Harrison Village stole my heart. She came back to talk to me one day and I started going over the gospel with her. When I asked her, “Do you believe that Jesus died on the cross for you?” She shook her head no. Now if you have never been involved in children’s ministry before, you may not know that it is very rare to find a child that doesn’t believe in Jesus. There is a reason that God calls us to a “child-like” faith, it’s because children readily believe! But this little girl, Leilani, didn’t. I asked her why and she told me that she wasn’t sure she could believe that Jesus died and rose again if she was there to see it. And she wasn’t sure she could believe in God if she couldn’t see him. My heart broke for her. I explained some reasons why we can believe in God like using the “air is invisible but it’s there” analogy or even explaining that I could feel God because I had a relationship with him. But none of them convinced her.  I explained to her that I didn’t want to convince her, I wanted her to believe on her own. I told her to pray and ask God to show her if he really is real. She felt kind of strange praying that, but I also prayed for her. I didn’t see her after that so I don’t know if God had shown himself to her or not yet. I believe God can work miracles for little Leilani and reveal himself to her in a way that is meaningful to her. I don’t know how he will do it yet, but I know he can. Pray with me, that God will speak to Leilani and that she will have an open mind and heart when he does. I may never find out what happens to Leilani, but I know that the word of God does not return void.

Our third club for the week was with a church in Allison Park. That club was completely different from the first two clubs of the day. We still had fun with the kids though and I was impressed with a lot of their knowledge of the Bible or quick-wittedness. At the end of the week we had reached 97 children between all three clubs and seen 15 salvation decisions. 

Pray with me for all of the leaders, parents, and children that heard the gospel in these past two weeks. Pray that the gospel would resonate in their hearts and speak loudly to them. Pray that God would reveal himself, not only to Leilani, but everyone who hears the gospel. The word of God does not return void. I don’t know how the gospel will change those that heard it these past weeks, but I know it will.

Isaiah 55:11 “So shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.”

Confessions of a Pittsburgh Missionary: The Desert

The Desert

June 22- July 3, 2015

Two weeks of ministry have passed. I meant to write an update sooner after last week but never got around to it. These first two weeks have certainly been busy as I have been spending time preparing myself, rather than the summer missionaries, for the ministry this summer. So I have been learning the lessons for myself, preparing the games, printing and cutting out various hand-outs needed for clubs, and other such preparatory tasks.

The first week of clubs is technically considered the second week of training. The summer missionaries are expected to use the clubs that week to learn how to put all that they learned at training school into action on top of finishing evaluations. AJ was away at camp for that week so I travelled out to Westmoreland County to help Cathy and all of her summer missionaries. We did three clubs there. The first club was at a church in Saltsburg. We had trouble getting the kids in the first club to get excited about what was going on. I think they did have fun in the end though. The second was through a rescue mission in Arnold. The kids there were urban and mostly unchurched kids. It was the hardest of the three clubs because of behavior issues. We crowded around a table made out of a slab of wood on top of crates under a canopy with holes in it every day. But the kids kept coming back and as the week went on, we gained more of their respect. The last was at a daycare in Arnold which was a ton of fun. They were very enthusiastic about everything which makes our program much easier. Talk about three very different clubs! One of Cathy’s summer missionaries said to me, “I like the last club. It’s indoors and the kids are excited to see us and everything is easier.” I responded with, “Yeah… but which club isn’t hearing the gospel anywhere else?” Not all of the clubs were easy but they all needed to hear the gospel. Some of the clubs needed us more than others because we were delivering a message they wouldn’t hear otherwise.

The kids huddled in the shade at Lighthouse Ministries in Arnold, PA.

This past week, AJ was back and we started our first week of ministry in Pittsburgh. We only had four days of clubs this week because of the holiday weekend. Our first club was at a Salvation Army on the North Side and the second one was with a child care center in East Liberty. We were returning to both of these clubs from last summer. I began to get very worried on Saturday night, however, when I started feeling sick. A bad cold had been going around since training school and I caught it. That definitely added a lot of stress to my week. I was not only preparing my first week of clubs on my own, I was also battling a bad cold. I am feeling much better. I'm still slightly congested but I am getting better. It was tough to be at the clubs when I didn’t feel good. Monday and Tuesday in particular were a challenge. Since it is just AJ and myself, I had to teach the lesson, which is about 15 minutes of talking, twice in one day. My voice was hoarse and my throat hurt after both times. Finally by Wednesday, I ended the clubs still having a voice. It was certainly stretching for AJ as I kept assigning him more tasks so he could do more of the talking. He had to step up and lead more than he is used to but I think it was good for him.

We had good groups at both locations. The Salvation Army has a day camp of about 30 kids. It took some time to gain their trust and get them to feel comfortable with us but once we did, they were sad to see us go. The childcare center kids were ages 2-5 so that definitely took some adapting. They have so much energy! As soon as I figured out some activity that would entertain them, it would last about three minutes and then I had to think of another one. I got the hang of it by the end of the week however. After giving the invitation on Thursday, one little girl came back to tell me that she had believed in Jesus for the first time so we are praising God for that. Despite my sickness, the goal was accomplished and we had a successful week.

A little girl named Kayla came back for counseling at the Salvation Army on Thursday. She had already believed in Jesus as her Savior, but she often liked to come back to talk to me. On Thursday she came back and was talking to me about the Bible. “We’re supposed to discover the world through books,” Kayla said, seeming to be quoting something she probably heard in school. “Right,” I said, “And the Bible is an excellent book to discover the world through because it’s God’s word.” She thought about it and then said, “Why do grown-ups always only read the Bible a little bit but then spend the rest of their time reading other books?” OUCH! There have been several occasions that I have seen kids display wisdom beyond their years without knowing it. This was one of them. I tried to explain that since the Bible is a little harder to understand, sometimes we just read a little bit of it to understand it better or sometimes we don’t want to read it because it’s hard to understand. She replied, “But you and Mr. AJ tell us really good stories from the Bible.” I nodded, “There are good stories in the Bible, aren’t there? People should read it more.”

God used Kayla’s innocent question to convict me once again of something that I think he’s been trying to get through my head for a while now. In another conversation this past week with my boyfriend, Patrick, I was expressing some of my feelings of stress and exhaustion with the week since I had been sick, tired, and still had a lot to do. He responded to me by telling me to relax. I responded that I didn’t think there would be opportunity for relaxing until the weekend. He responded by saying, “When I say relax, I just mean that God has it under control. If you don’t take the time to refresh yourself, then you’ll lose your ability to be effective. You can’t continue to pour into the kids if you aren’t allowing time for God to pour into you.” It’s moments like these that make me love and appreciate Patrick all the more. But OUCH! Twice this past week, God used two people, first Patrick, and secondly Kayla, to speak to me.

You see, if I’m being perfectly honest, my relationship with God has not been the first priority in my life lately. I have been neglecting to spend time with him or read his word for some time now. I think I felt the separation, the dryness, that the lack of spending personal time with God brought a little bit before the summer started. But during that time, I was also regularly doing devotions with Patrick as well. When the summer started, I just wasn’t spending any time at all with God. And once the ministry started, I really began to feel it. I noticed it during the second week of training with Cathy. Something felt amiss, something was off. Why didn’t I have the energy like I did last year? Why does this ministry feel so dry? And then this week, though I tried to blame it on the sickness, I knew in my heart it was deeper than that. Where was my passion?

The thing is that there’s no passion in going through the motions. There’s no passion in doing things just to do them. There’s no passion in serving someone if you’re not also enjoying a relationship with them. There’s no passion in serving God if you’re not also spending time with him. When you don’t take any time to refresh yourself with living water, no matter what you do, you’ll find yourself trudging through a desert.

Picture Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desert 

Though I’ve spent all summer thus far in ministry, serving God, teaching children about him, I’ve been in a desert.  Because even though I’m telling others how they can experience God’s love, I haven’t been taking the time to experience God for myself. Sometimes in Bible College and ministry you can fall the thought process that being surrounding by the Bible constantly is enough to feed us spiritually. But it’s not! That living water that refreshes you, is found not by talking about the Bible or about God, but by experiencing him for yourself.

I’ve been in a desert. I haven’t been taking time to refresh myself with God. I’ve been pouring out of an empty pitcher. I praise God that he can use me and use my words in spite of my own shortcomings and can still use the lessons I’ve taught and words I’ve ministered with so far this summer. But it’s time to get out of the desert. God showed me that twice this week, through Patrick and Kayla. God not only used the voice of someone I love, he used the voice of a child. I have been reminded just how important it is to spend personal time with God. And yes, I read my Bible this morning. As you pray for me, please pray that I would continue to be reminded of the important lesson I learned this week. Pray that I would be daily refreshing myself in the presence of a God who loves me. And please hold me accountable, ask me how I’m doing. Ask me if I’m staying refreshed. Ask me if I’ve let God lead me out of the desert.

What about you? Are you in the desert? Do you also need to refresh yourself with living water?

Picture Source: http://lwcc.net.au/

Confessions of a Pittsburgh Missionary: We Are Qualified

June 13-21, 2015

It was a long, tiring, and very rainy week, but AJ and I successfully completed another year of CYIA (Christian Youth In Action) training school. We gathered with the rest of the summer staff for Pennsylvania at a camp in Orrstown. Here we conquered classes and study halls that started at 8 AM and ended at 8 PM. I helped Cathy, the director of Westmoreland County, evaluate all of her summer missionaries (she has 8 total) on their Bible lessons, songs, memory verses, and missions stories that they needed to study and then perform for a leader. I enjoyed the opportunity to be able to work with Cathy, her daughter Kim, and all of her teens again. AJ really enjoyed the opportunity to make friends with them and lots of other teens. I also reconnected with some friends from training school when I was a first year summer missionary (2008) and other/newer friends that I made last summer.

The week definitely had its challenging moments as is to be expected when spending a whole week with about a hundred other people. I think it rained every day and we fought several battles with a mop against a small flood (large puddle really) in our cabin. I was definitely ready to get out of the wet humid forest and have a little alone time by the time we were leaving.

This is the beautiful creek that runs around the campground.

But that’s not to say it wasn’t a good week. There were many valuable lessons and reminders during training camp this year. The first, which seemed to be the theme, was the quote “God does not call the qualified, he qualifies the called.” This quote was distributed on a little card to all of the students and staff at the start of camp. It seemed that many of the students needed that message. On Saturday when they arrived, many of them were nervous and a bit reserved. By Wednesday however, they were thriving in open air ministry where they shared the gospel through the Wordless Book with children that attended two different events. Whether they felt qualified or not, they were used by God to reach about 150 children on Wednesday night. 20 of those children made first time decisions to trust in Jesus as their Savior. It is definitely easy to feel unqualified when heading into a summer of ministry. But God doesn’t require qualifications to call you into ministry. If you are called, he will qualify you. CYIA training camp certainly qualified AJ and even myself for a summer full of ministry.

For Friday Fun Night, the students participated in a Wild West murder mystery.

Cathy, or "JP James" was the culprit.

The theme verse for the week was 1 Thessalonians 5:24 which says, “He who calls you is faithful. He will surely do it.” Pastor Bob, the CYIA chaplain, would have us recite this verse every morning as he stood to give a chapel message. As the week went on, the verse grew more and more meaningful to me. Particularly on Wednesday night I realized the meaning that the verse had for me. Seven years ago I had arrived at CYIA training school feeling very nervous about what the summer held.  I didn’t even want to do CEF but I knew that I was called and I chose not to argue with that calling. Little did I know in June of 2008 that God had even bigger plans for me through CEF than just the events that the summer held. God used that summer to confirm my calling into a career in ministry. God was preparing, even five years earlier, to provide me with a job in January 2013 when I had school bills to pay and $20 to my name. Through getting hired with CEF Broome, God opened the door to work as the coordinator for Greater Pittsburgh. I did not feel qualified that summer but I was called. And God has surely done it! Once again I was reminded of his great faithfulness in my life. God is still faithful. He surely is still doing things in my life and is still at work.

Some of the other PA directors and I watching the students play games as part of a demo club.

Mike Petkof is the missionary that CEF of Pennsylvania is sponsoring this summer. He is working with CEF in Greece shared with us. He said two things during a few of his presentations that really struck me. The first thing that he said was, "Don't strive to make your presence noticed, just make your absence felt." This is such a good reminder to those in ministry. Our goal should not be to be noticed while we are there, but to be missed once we have left. Pray that CEF Pittsburgh would be remembered and missed as we move from location to location this summer. Secondly, Mike shared with us that, “80% of all those who die today will die believing whatever they believed as children.” There are many children in the world today that don’t yet know about Jesus’ love for them. There are many children in Pittsburgh that have not yet believed on Jesus to save them from their sins. My goal is to reach as many of those children this summer as possible. If they are not reached as children, it is much harder to reach them as adults. Pray that God would go before us and open the hearts of the children in Pittsburgh.

I had a restful Sunday but today I start back up again bright and early. I’ll be joining Cathy in Westmoreland County to help her teens complete their second week of at home training. Cathy has three clubs scheduled with study halls to help her teens finish the rest of their evaluations in between. Pray for me as I’ll be travelling about 45 minutes each way and have another long week ahead of me. Pray for patience and energy as I help Cathy. Pray for AJ as he spends this next week at teen camp. Pray for a few more contacts that I have made, that they will answer my phone calls and either confirm or turn down the opportunity for a club this summer (especially that they’d confirm) so that I can finish the schedule this week. And pray for my brother as he sets off in the morning to travel all the way to Laos. He is spending the summer ministering with our cousin. Pray for travelling safety and ease. Pray for an awesome time in Laos. And pray that God would equip him just as he continues to equip us all.

I still don’t feel qualified in some areas and at some times. But I am called and I know that he is qualifying me day by day. He is faithful.

Please pray for me this summer as I work a laborer of the harvest in Pittsburgh.

Confessions of a Pittsburgh Missionary: The Kick Off

Confessions of a Pittsburgh Missionary: The Kick Off      

May 18-June 12, 2015

The past month has been a bit of a blur. I can’t believe how quickly it has passed by! I returned to Pittsburgh from Binghamton on the 14^th of May (without much help from my car) and got ready to start the summer. There have been some aspects of this year of CEF that have been easier. But there have also been some aspects that have been more challenging.

The first part that has been challenging is that we have only one part time summer missionary other than myself, AJ. Because he splits his summer between CEF and a camp, that leaves three weeks of the summer without a partner. At first I was confident that God would supply someone else. But he didn’t. While that was challenging at first, that doesn’t mean God didn’t provide. He has just provided in a different way than I planned. Two of the three weeks are going to be covered by a Westmoreland missionary, Mary. She helped me last summer as well so I am grateful for her help. One week has yet to be covered, I am working to make arrangements for that week still, but I am confident that God will provide even if it isn’t in the way that I am expecting now. I have continued to book our schedule with lots of good clubs, trusting that God will provide.

The second challenging part has been that I have very much felt like I was running behind schedule for most of the past month. There was so much to do and I felt like I should be twice ahead of where I was. But even in spite of my shortcomings, God has once again pulled it all together. We had several churches seeking out CEF for help with VBSs and whatnot. Though I lost a few locations from last summer, we got into several new ones. I have 15 clubs on the schedule and 3-4 more clubs in the works. I expect God will do a great work in Pittsburgh this summer and I am excited to dive into inner city ministry once again.

Scheduling in and of itself this summer was a bit easier than before since I already had many of my contacts from last summer. I definitely have fewer fears about working as the coordinator this year as compared to last year. I still don’t like making phone calls to strangers, but I was also able to do it with more confidence than last year. 5-Day Clubs are also less intimidating because I know what to expect from most of them. In spite of feeling like I was behind, everything got pulled together just in time and we are on our way to a successful summer of ministry.

This past week I went to a Vertical Church Band concert that was in Pittsburgh. I had gone to the same concert last summer as well. I remember that I had so many fears last summer. I had my fair share of fears about the summer ministry but I was especially struggling with the fear of being lonely in the approaching semester as most of my friends were not returning. One of their songs in particular spoke to me as it was about trusting in Christ, the solid rock, because he never moves. I clung to that song during last summer and even into the fall. I prayed that God would provide friends and I trusted that because God had called me to Davis, he would provide everything I needed. Last summer, God was really speaking to me about being willing to be lonely if that was the kind of trial I needed to grow closer to the Lord. This summer as I was at the concert, they played that song again. I smiled because I realized how different of a place I am in compared to last summer. I realized that God had answered all of those prayers. I had dared to trust God with uncertain situations last summer. This summer, I can look back and see how he was faithful to bring stability and blessings out of all those. I had an awesome summer last summer and God provided me with a best friend to be by my side throughout the school year, my boyfriend Patrick. His faithfulness continues to be evident and I am blessed. I know that God continues to be faithful and I can’t wait to see how his faithfulness is proved this summer.

AJ and I are at the week of state training this week. I’ve already encountered several old friends, and though I am tired, I am having fun. Pray for me as I make final arrangements for the summer. Pray for AJ as he has a long week of classes and evaluations ahead of him. And pray for Pittsburgh. Pray that the city would be ready for a team of CEF Missionaries to bring the gospel of Jesus Christ this summer. I am trusting God’s faithfulness and provision and expecting big things for the summer. 

This is only the kick off.