God is Worthy of my Trust: May 31, 2009

Psalm 46:10 “Be still and know that I am God.”

Five years ago today I had two seizures and was diagnosed with viral encephalitis, a brain infection. I spent eighteen days in a hospital and had more needles and scans done of my body and brain than I ever thought I’d need. I was bed-ridden the other half of the summer and not able to take part in any of the things I had planned for the summer. Those plans had included being a section captain in my high school’s marching band and spending my summer serving God as a Child Evangelism Fellowship summer missionary. But instead, I got sick, really sick. I couldn’t understand why God was doing this to me! I was going to spend my summer serving him, why had he allowed me to get sick and taken that away from me? I remember being in the hospital and feeling like God spoke to me and asked, “Lindsey, do you trust me?” I didn’t respond, because the honest answer was that at that point it felt too hard to trust God.

But this verse, Psalm 46:10, became one of the many themes for that summer. In the midst of that crazy and unpredictable trial in my life, I had to be still and trust that God was God and he was in control. I had to sit back and take a breather, I was kind of forced to do that since I was so sick anyways. But it allowed me to pause, be still, and remember that God is God. He is the one who holds our past, present, and future. And even though life didn’t make sense at that point in time, God had never stopped being God. He had always been in control, I just had to trust him. He was in control, he was bigger than the situation, and he was worthy of my trust.

And he did not fail me. He healed me in miraculous ways, not instantly, but still miraculously. The doctors are shocked when I go back for check-ups because I’m doing so well for someone who had such a serious illness. I suffer from little to no side effects. And it’s all because of God, he wasn’t finished with me yet. He still had a plan, and even though it was a hard time in my life, I just had to learn to trust God. I look back on this day as a sort of second birthday. It’s special to me because it reminds that God is good and faithful and trustworthy. And that day, May 31, 2009, changed me for the better in so many ways. I am grateful I went through what I did because it made me a stronger person.

I got the word “Blessings” tattooed on my shoulder with the date of my brain infection and seizures underneath. I got it to remind me that even when life is crazy, and even when it seems like God is taking things away, he also gives many blessings. It’s a reminder to me, to be still, know that God is in control, and just trust him. I hope my story reminds you of the same, and I hope the next time you are going through a hard time, you remember to pause and take time to trust God because he is faithful and worthy of our trust.

Blessings,
Lindsey

May 31, 2009, I was lying in the hospital with a swollen brain. May 31, 2014, I am well and healthy and living a normal life and enjoying the many blessings he continues to give me.