Day 8: July
19, 2012
Today
was a fairly empty and yet relaxing day. I didn’t have to help with breakfast
this morning so instead I got to sleep in a little. But I still got up around
8AM. It was weird to have so much free time in the morning! But it was also
nice. I cleaned my room up and got a few others things done. But I also took
the time to read my Bible. And it is so interesting to see how God took the
theme of my devotions and related it to much of what was spoken on in church
tonight.
This
morning’s devotions were in Acts 7. It’s the story of Stephen being stoned. What
struck me most about the story is Stephen’s willingness to forgive. Often times
we as humans encourage grudges or bitterness for a while if it seems
reasonable. For examples, someone killed your son, yeah you have a right to
hold a grudge! Someone raped your daughter? Of course you have reason to be bitter!
Someone broke into your house and robbed all of your valuables? You take your
sweet time forgiving them! We have tricked ourselves into believing that
holding grudges, if the reason is legitimate enough, is okay! We are also under
the impression that it takes a lot of time to forgive someone who has really
hurt you. But let’s look at the story of Stephen again.
Acts 7:54-60 “When the members of the Sanhedrin heard this, they
were furious and gnashed
their teeth at him. But Stephen, full
of the Holy Spirit, looked up to
heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God. “Look,”
he said, “I see heaven open and the Son
of Man standing at the right hand of
God.” At this they covered their ears and, yelling at
the top of their voices, they all rushed at him, dragged him out of the city and began to stone him. Meanwhile, the witnesses laid their coats at the feet of a young man named Saul. While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, "Lord Jesus, receive my spirit." Then he fell on his knees and cried out, "Lord, do not hold this sin against them." When he had said this, he fell asleep."
Stephen forgave the people murdering him WHILE they were murdering
him! He didn’t need a few years to hold the grudge and work on forgiving them.
He forgave them for their wrong in the midst of them doing it! Would you be
able to forgive someone for killing your son while they were stabbing him?
Would you be able to forgive someone for raping your daughter while they were
doing it? Would you be able to forgive someone for robbing you while they were
in your house taking your stuff? Probably not… not by yourself that is.
There is one very important part of the story of Stephen to take
note of. In Acts 7:55 it says Stephen was full of the Holy Spirit. He had the
spirit of God in him and living through him. It was not by Stephen’s own power
that he was able to forgive these people killing him. It was the spirit of God
in him, helping him to do this, the same spirit that was in Jesus when he cried
out for God to forgive those crucifying him. Forgiveness is really hard and is
a process and takes a long time and it’s easier to be bitter… when we are
trying to do it by ourselves. Forgiveness is a lot easier when you let Jesus
fill you through the Holy Spirit giving you his power and strength to forgive
unconditionally.
I struggle with forgiveness. I mean I really struggle with forgiveness! I have been hurt a lot in life,
and often by people closest to me which can hurt even more. I have reasons to
hold some grudges and be bitter. But I don’t want to hold them anymore! Tonight
at worship God really laid it on my heart that in order to love on the people
here in Costa Rica and other places in the world, I need to love the people
that have hurt me as well. Part of following God’s will for my life, as shared
in the sermon tonight, is being able to love. That means even loving the people
that have deeply hurt me.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 “Love is
patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not
easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
Let’s
see… love is patient… yeah I’m not so good at that. Love is kind, not only to friends
but also enemies… yeah, nope. Love does not envy or boast… not my weakest areas…
not my strongest either. Love is not proud, does not dishonor others, is not
self-seeking, not easily angered… yeah I’m not too good at those either. Love
keeps NO record of wrongs… no grudges, no bitterness, no anger because of the
past. The Bible doesn’t say, “When not given a reason to be otherwise, love is
patient, kind, doesn’t envy or boast, isn’t proud, dishonoring to others,
self-seeking, easily angered, and doesn’t keep records of wrongs.” Love is all
of those things IN SPITE OF what other people do. That means loving people,
even the ones that have hurt you, with all of those same qualities listed in 1
Corinthians 13.
But I
can’t do it on my own, I need God’s help. I need his spirit dwelling in me and
working in mighty ways in my heart. I need his spirit to defeat my own sinful
desire to hang onto the grudge and to forgive instead. There’s no way I can
forgive others on my own, it’s too difficult, too radical. Like Stephen, I need
to have Jesus working in my life and through my heart in order to forgive in a
radical way.
“God,
get rid of the ‘Lindsey’ in me and instead replace me with Jesus.”
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